Kiddos

Geeze I love those kids.
I was having a horrible day, feeling sick and generally frumpy.
Got to my kiddo's house. Had some time alone with Annie and got to talk sports sports sports. That girl is awesome at every sport, and I LOVE what a tom boy she is!
Then Jimmy man had a slight meltdown because he wanted to play wii, and because he didn't want to eat his bannana (Completely understandable right?!) He was so grumpy so I just picked hi up and tickled him till he was happy, then he got a tubby- his favortie thing ever.

ok, yes I realize no one but me cares about any of this but it just amazes me how much I love them. Granted I know it's easy to love them when I don't have to deal with whiny kids all day, but even when they are whiny or so something wrong, I can't stop loving them. Eek I can't wait to have kids. Ok edit that. I want a good job, my best man friend/love, and I want to be able to give my kiddos the world first. Dog first. Human later.

Yes, I still want to be a powerful journalist. Yes I want to be extremely educated and succesful. But I now also want to be mommy. I want to love someone else more than I could ever love myself, more than I ever thought possible.
Someday I hope to understand the way my mother feels.

Either you are an idiot, or I don't know how to effectively execute a booty call.
Ha. Bad idea anyway.

I am going to ask the landlord if I can get a dog. I am so nervous I want to throw up. I am so ready for a furry friend.

I want to find MY happy.
I want to run.

It's all false love and affection.

You don't want me, you just want the attention.

Life is busy, and hard, and honestly I'm worn out.
I think that's why I play with the idea of you.

Honestly, I know it wouldn't work. Couldn't work. But you know me. No, you knew me. And I just want to sleep in your bed again.

Uncool

Yes, part of me wants to be "cool" again. To do the things I know you like to do. To be just like you. and you.

But I'm too set on this. I like this person I see in the mirror. Now that I know what's out there, it's hard to go back and settle for that life.

So for now, the assurance that I am moving forward, while you are standing still is enough for me to deal with being "uncool."

"Who put such a high premium on being typical?"

When I walk Scouty, and we walk by a stranger, she gets so excited and runs up to them like she has never been so happy to see someone before.

I think people should be more like Scouty the dog.